Seventeen

I’m just an immature little kid.

I’m a 5 year old stuck in a 17 year olds body.

I still have this dream that I’m going to be a Princess.

Every night before I go to sleep I wish on a star outside my bedroom window. 
When I am done with my wish I lay my head down and hold my stuffed puppy.
I still have this crazy idea that Peter Pan will come for me in my sleep and take me to Neverland with him. 
Then we will go to Neverland and the boys will have a mother.

I love watching all the old Disney movies from when I was 5.

Catching lightening bugs outside seems to never bore me.

Coloring intrigues me for hours.

I’m daddy’s little girl and mommy’s mischief girl.

If there’s a birthday cake sitting out you can bet my hand will be in it.

I love love love to swing but somehow my 17 year old hips don’t always fit in all the swings.

I love to slide too. The twisty slides are my favorite.

Light brites never cease to fascinate me.

I love to think about growing up and becoming a mom,
But at the same time I don’t want to.
Growing up is is never easy.

" Who are you to judge the life I live ?

I know I'm not perfect - & I don't live to be.

But before you start pointing fingers,

make sure your hands are clean.. "

- Bob Marley

I really don't think that anyone in this world knows the real me. My closest friends know me better than anyone else, but I don't think I’ve ever let certain sides of me come out around anyone except myself. I keep some feelings hidden because no one would understand, and even if they did understand, there wouldn't be anything that anyone could do to make the feelings disappear. :')

P/s: I guess it's never too old for night time cubbies. :0

Do you ever get that feeling where you don't want to talk to anybody? You don't want to smile and you don't want to fake being happy. But at the same time you don't know exactly what's wrong either. There isn't a way to explain it to someone who doesn't already understand. If you could want anything in the world it would be to be alone. People have stopped being comforting and being along never was. At least when you're alone no one will constantly ask you what is wrong and there isn't anyone who won't take 'I don't know' for an answer. You feel the way you do just because. You hope the feeling will pass soon and that you will be able to be yourself again, but until then all you can do is wait.

Dear Sofea,

shut up now, will you?

Irreplaceable

You can never replace anyone, because everyone is made up of such beautiful specific details.